When it comes to romance, there’s nothing that puts on the pressure like a first date – especially if you’re the one in charge of coming up with something to do.
Movies and TV shows portray first dates as pivotal moments in romantic stories, and that can create heightened expectations and unrealistic standards. Since every first date has the potential to blossom into a long-term relationship, people often worry about finding a way to make the evening perfect.
First, relax. Opening yourself up to someone new involves a certain level of vulnerability, and your date is probably just as nervous as you are. There’s nothing wrong with the “dinner and a movie” scenario, but if you’re hoping to both “keep it real” and make a good first impression, here are some other ideas you may want to try:
Try a Coffee Date
This is a low-key version of the classic “dinner date,” but it’s less pressure (and less expensive). It’s also an ideal ice-breaker date because it’s inherently a shorter meeting and more casual. Statistically, it takes a maximum of four minutes to do a “vibe check” on someone and determine if an actual romance is possible – and that makes a coffee date perfect.
- Tips for success – Look for a place with a comfortable atmosphere – you’re better off with a cozy local cafe than a bustling Starbucks. Keep your conversation light and friendly and try to pick a time when you know the cafe isn’t likely to be overly crowded or noisy.
Go On an Outdoor Adventure
Are you an outdoorsy sort? Are you looking for someone else who will share their spare time with you while you hike, bike or explore a park? There’s nothing wrong with setting the tone with a low-key walk on a trail.
- Tips for success – Don’t pick a hard trail to show off your skills. You want to be able to carry on a conversation while you walk. Make sure you tell your date this is what you plan to do so that they wear comfortable clothing and suitable walking shoes – and bring along water and snacks.
Visit a Museum or Art Gallery
Museums and art galleries offer stimulating environments with plenty of conversation starters – plus a chance to explore your shared interests in history, science or art. It’s also comfortably public, which can ease a date’s concerns about being alone with someone they don’t really know.
- Tips for success – Choose a museum or gallery with exhibits that interest both of you. The Indianapolis Motor Speedway Museum is great, but only if you (and your companion) are into racing. Newfields has more variety, and there are plenty of smaller art galleries and museums in the area that you can visit. For a first date, a small venue is probably ideal.
Attend a Live Music Show
This is an elevated twist on the “drinks in a bar” routine. Whether it’s an actual concert or a local band in your favorite brewery or bar, live performances provide both entertainment and a shared experience that you can use as a post-show conversation starter.
- Tips for success – Pick a venue that you’ve visited before so that you know the atmosphere is right for your date. Plan to stay for one or two drinks – not the whole show.
Go to a Farmers’ Market
This is a great daytime date idea because it’s casual, relaxed and offers plenty of fodder for conversation and positive interactions. You can explore local food and produce offerings and test the waters for compatibility.
- Tips for success – Remember that you’re not really there to shop. Wander through the stalls and look at the wares, then find a few snacks or homemade treats to share.
Try Mini Golf or Bowling
Are you inherently playful and looking for the same in a mate? Mini golf and bowling can help you identify that trait in a potential partner – and you can see how they handle winning or losing.
- Tips for success – Focus on having fun rather than winning – because this really isn’t about the competition. Cheer good shots and bad shots alike to keep the mood positive.
Try a Do-It-Yourself Workshop
There are “DIY” classes and workshops that involve making pottery, painting or cooking that offer creative and engaging environments for a first date – and they’re just plain fun! If the date goes well, you can always extend the day with another one of these ideas.
- Tips for success – Choose a beginner-friendly class and enjoy the creative process. If you’re feeling genuinely interested in your date, consider trading your finished piece for theirs as a memento.
Go Thrifting
Thrifting is an unconventional but highly enjoyable first-date idea that offers a mix of adventure, creativity and spontaneity – and no two dates will ever be exactly alike. It’s also an affordable, eco-friendly option that allows you to discover what the other person is like in everyday situations.
- Tips for success – Look for thrift stores with a variety of items, such as clothing, books, antiques, and home decor. Research a few options beforehand to ensure there’s plenty to explore. Set a small spending limit and make a game of seeing who can find the weirdest, coolest or most interesting object.
Try a Combo
All these date ideas involve relatively short interactions that don’t require a lot of commitment from either party. If you don’t feel that special spark with your date, you can still have fun and you can end the date gracefully and move on.
If the date is going well, however, and you and the other person “click,” you can pivot to another one of these ideas and immediately extend the date. Follow the Farmer’s Market or thrifting adventure with coffee, for example, or hit a casual dining restaurant after the workshop or musical performance.
The trick to a successful first date is to keep it light and simple so that you can focus on having fun. Try to remember that a first date is just an initial meeting, not a test or an interview. Aim to be your most authentic self and try not to worry about the long-term potential. That can help you stay in the moment and set the foundation for a genuine connection with your date.
